Vale ebay

About three years ago a friend introduced me to the wonders of ebay. Lots of fun. Selling, buying, bidding... many a friday evening was spent with a glass of wine exploring quilt fabric and buying small amounts from people everywhere. There is stacks of stuff in our house purchased on ebay over the last few years - even our lounge suite (massive bargain at $199 - it was brand new and worth at least $1000).
But over time, ebay seems to have gone south.
The last few items I've purchased have left a lot to be desired. Sellers used to list every single possible flaw, even taking close up pictures of the item to show the slightest scratch or whatever. Now, however, things are so different to what is listed that it's like you've bought something from another person's listing!
Additionally, what is it with the listings that say "I reserve the right to not sell the item to you at the end of the auction as I have it listed elsewhere" - what a hide! There ought to be lashings for these people who list items as auctions instead of buy it now (with an actual purchase price), and then reneg on the deal. They should not be allowed to use ebay! I don't even bother bidding, but it's annoying because it always seems to be very close to exactly what I wanted...
The international deals have been a real eye-opener for me. I have had a number of people based in the USA trying to rip me off blindly - asking me to send packages they've 'won' at auction without actually sending funds (and in one case, never intending to, for an amount in the hundreds of dollars). Two US-based bidders were completely clueless and should never have bought internationally because exchange rates, postage and payment details were beyond their comprehension! That said, the trades I have done to the Eastern countries have always been without a hitch. They were always polite, fast trades. I've decided not to sell or buy from the US any more at all. Could this be indicative of a respect thing? The patriotism of the US gone rampant in that Americans will not bother paying an Australian seller because we're just not 'on the same level as them'? Maybe I'm very cynical.
Now I'm looking for a new entertainment unit. There are some great prices locally in the stores, but I figured I might find something appropriate on ebay. I was disappointed to see that most of the listings on ebay were just as expensive, if not priced higher than brand new ones in the stores!
Some people really need to get a grip on reality. If you've had something - anything - in your house for no matter how long, and are trying to re-sell it, then it's not worth as much as it was when you bought it. Period.
So I'm saying farewell to buying anything on ebay other than my quilting fabrics and electronic games for the kids, from people I've traded with before.
Now that Dodgy Brothers International seems to have taken over ebay, I'd rather pay retail and get something decent.

Friends

The best people in the world are the friends that you can really unequivocally count on. The ones who you know you can ask anything of, even if you haven't spoken for a while. These are the people who value your friendship for you as a person, and not for any other reason. These people see you warts and all, and have already forgotten the words that you want to be able to take back or forget, but never seem capable of. These are the people you get a simple joy out of being there for, out of speaking to, out of remembering - even just thinking of them. There's no strings. No conditions. These are the friendships that are lifelong.
These friends are the ones cheering loudest at your achievements. Wondering aloud at how your everyday life is managed. Honestly saying you are wonderful, meaning every word. Honestly telling you how it is, because they want you to be happy, not to bring you down. These friends will tell you off for something, yet turn around and help you smooth things over.
And these are the people I feel the same way about!
They are what gives a woman like me security, knowing that if it felt like everything in my life fell apart, they'd ensure I didn't completely lose it - I know this because I can remember one or two times when this has happened.
Girls, you know who you are (I know you read my blog). Thank you for being you, for being there. For the morning teas (that end up afternoon teas), all too far apart. I think you're all fantastic, and how lucky we are to have this friendship!

Excessive cost of education

I spent this morning doing a little bit of a search on doing a Masters degree. I've done pretty well at Uni so far, and would like to go further. I find it very difficult to believe that the charge to students (at minimum, $13600 for coursework) for one year of study is justified. I've been told to just defer the bulk of the cost through HECS, but ultimately I'll end up paying it all out very quickly through the tax system. HECS repayments are based on your income, and doesn't take into account the fact you have four children and a massive mortgage to deal with.

You have to wonder what incentive there is to do any post-graduate education. At the end of the day, you'll be lucky to get a job which adds the amount it cost you to get the qualification to the salary you were already getting.

The students coming through the education system are focused on simply passing the minimum requirement. When there's no incentive to go any further - in fact, the cost for the education becomes inflated past all reason (goodness me, $13600???) - who can really blame them? By supporting a system that charges such ridiculous fees our Government is holding back the people it should be encouraging to study further.

Do you want to be looked after by a doctor, lawyer - teacher - who only just scraped through?

Never pay retail

I remember when I couldn't find something I would go out and buy a new one. I also remember days of 'retail therapy' when shopping for everything (except jeans or swimmers!) was entertaining.
These days I am a cheapskate. I won't pay full price for anything. I've always loved catalogues, but anything less than 20% off is not enough of a discount.
I love a bargain - but only if it's something I really want. These days I can hold out for weeks, if not months, for something to get it exactly right. After 8 years I still have plastic outdoor chairs around our breakfast bar because I've never seen low backed wooden chairs sturdy enough (and cheap enough) for my liking.
I'm also in need of a new dishwasher (the one we have now is dying quickly, taking two hours to get through a cycle). And the kids need some new furniture - nothing matches, everything was second hand, two kid mattresses have needed replacing for years, and two chests of drawers are missing fronts!
I'm taking pride in trying to get our finances in order, but it's a real battle. I'm winning, but slowly. It will take years to get rid of our debt - and that doesn't even include the mortgage.
We're an average Australian middle class family - but sometimes things have got to give a little.
I guess it's time *I* loosened the wallet a bit, got the replacement things I have wanted to get for so long, and stopped resenting the spending of others.

Supermum begins!

It's school holidays at last (we're halfway through them now actually) and I promised my head teacher that I'd entertain the world with my naive rantings by starting my own blog. I'm an ex-journalist, now teaching in TAFE, feeling much like a clown juggling skittles on the edge of a cliff. Sometimes it's funny, usually it's full of unbridled passion, but it's a rollercoaster. So here we go!
In the middle of the night, when all the kids are asleep, I have extraordinarily opinionated moments of clarity on life, current affairs and so on. My wisdom simply must be shared - although in the cold light of day, perhaps not.
In any case, a commitment to blogging was made, and so I will proceed. No doubt I will offend some but hopefully will find like-minded females out there who share my daily tedium, and who will understand.
Last night I decided that feminism has done men a much greater service than women. (I told you I'd probably offend people). In my 36 years I've discovered that there are no Disney-style marriages. Get partnered up and ready for disappointment, girls. At best you'll get a friend for life. At worst you'll be cultivating an adversary who will sap every ounce of strength you've got and leave you devastated, trying to salvage any dense of dignity with children who blame you for pushing their dad away.
Luckily, I've never had the really bad stuff happen to me - but I know people who have. Thanks to feminism, we can now "have it all" - but today's men seem to consider that we SHOULD do it all. All the housework, childcare, and still have a fulltime job with the salary to match or, even better, exceed their own. Wow, are they doing well out of this.
We are joint signaturies on the mortgage, car loan, etc. We take on all the responsibility and society accepts it while we struggle to get kids to school, mop floors and hide the throw-up on our suit jackets. Meanwhile the DH still doesn't know how to change a toilet roll.
My mum has never even had to complete her own tax return. My dad has always done it all.
Gone are the days of the hubby providing a 'housekeeping allowance' to the wife to pay for groceries or whatever. These days men can't budget to save their lives. They do less around the house than ever before. At best, they pay the lawn mower guy. At worst, the woman books him AND pays him (as well as the childcare she already pays for).
Maybe a prince for this century will be one who pays more than lip service to caring for his family. He will be one who really begins to sacrifice and compromise - one who puts his family first, beyond career and personal success - in a way that actually hurts, just as we females have always had to do.
Time to address the balance. Time to bring our boys up to see cooking and cleaning as normal activities that don't require boobs - and remember to open a door, and to remember that every woman is important, and even though she CAN do everything, a loving relationship means she should never, ever, be made to.